Category: Mexico

Things I’m learning and loving about this country

Five Things I Learned in Tlajomulco

On By Kamiko BlalarkIn La Fuente, Mexico, Missions, Vanguardia4 Comments

Saludos!

It’s been a while, and a lot has happened. I want to thank everyone who has been following along despite the fact that I’m not as good as I should be at keeping you updated. That being said, I’ll continue with the update.

As you know (if you read my last post), last month I went on a mission trip to Tlajomulco, a city near Guadalajara. Even though I knew I would enjoy it more than I thought I would (so my expectations were high from the start), I didn’t think I would be as affected by it as I was. I evangelised, fed people, prayed for strangers, sang for worship, acted for skits, etc… and in doing so, I learned these things:

1. Don’t over think. Just be.

I don’t have it in me to do and be everything perfectly, no matter how hard I try or how determined I am or how well-prepared I may be. And that’s okay. I’m not here to make myself or my team or my school look good. I’m here to glorify the only One worthy of praise, and if I keep my focus on Him, then my slip-ups won’t matter in the grand scheme of things, and my mistakes are opportunities for the magnification of Christ, just as much as the things I do right. I learned that God made me the way He wanted, and whatever I don’t appreciate, I either developed in rebellion (anything that goes against God’s Word/ anything I’ve done apart from Him), or I have yet to trust Him with. The best I can do is to seek Him and be in His presence, to focus on His glory and planning. It’s okay to let go and just… be. Be in His presence. Be who He is calling me to be. Be a little uncomfortable sometimes. Be awkward, silly, useful, unsure, emotional – alive. In every moment, be alive, and aware that you’re here for a purpose, and be grateful for those very reasons – sometimes, I think they’re all that separates me from the dead and dying.

2. Make an effort. Really.

Gosh, how I wish I had put the same effort into the first week that I had put into the last week. I wish I had put more effort into the trip as a whole. I didn’t really understand the extent of the regret I would feel until after we were on our way home and I saw the “TEPIC” sign greeting us, and I forced myself to hold back tears of “have I really left that place? Is it really over?” I wish I had put more effort into my work, my Spanish skills, my worship, my leadership (goodness, my leadership), and my interactions with people. Those I’ll probably never properly meet, and those I should have invested in long before the crusade began. But because I can’t go back and change what I did or didn’t do, the best I can do now is to use it as a learning experience and try my best to carry it with me.

3. Short term =/= Insignificant.

Sometimes, short term relationships (referring to platonic friendships) are just as meaningful as the long term. I’ve always had an insatiable yearning for connection, and as a result, I often find myself avoiding certain people due to the feeling I get which tells me: this isn’t going to last. Of course, coming here to Mexico took every relationship I could potentially form and turned them into one huge boulder that barely fit in the pit of my stomach, and it was hard to swallow. The feeling of “this isn’t going to last” was inescapable. Unless I planned on staying here long-term, none of these people would be in my life longer than a year, and that put me on edge and made me feel a little empty inside. It scared me. I’m still trying to get over the fear, in all honesty. But in Tlajomulco, I met some new people, and I met some old ones as well – my classmates. For months, I kept to myself, endured awkward small talk, and stayed nestled in that nook whose slippery edges I had become familiar with – welcome, but out of place. For months, I did this to make sure I wouldn’t get too attached. But as I worked with them, ate with them, and worshipped with them, they crawled out of the boxes I placed them in, neatly labeled for my convenience, “extras/short-term acquaintances,” and planted themselves somewhere warmer and closer. It was slow enough not to feel fabricated, but quick enough to feel as if it caused me a kind of mild trauma. But I wouldn’t take it back, because they helped me grow, gently urged me out of my shell, and made me feel like I was home. Like I belonged. I forgot I was over 1,000 miles away from home, in a different country. It felt familiar. But saddening at the same time, because as they were all crying over the bittersweetness of leaving one another, I once again felt out of place, because I still wasn’t nearly as close to them as they were each other. But once again, I know now, and I’m investing in the people who are still here – still scared, but not weighed down anymore.

4. Put yourself out there.

For those who know me personally, you know I am not exactly what you would call a confident person. I hesitate. I doubt. I get scared sometimes. But if I don’t put myself out there, I’m not very likely to grow. I can have the best theories, sound theology, and pure intentions, but if I keep it in my head, and not in my heart and hands and on my sleeve, what good is it? If I don’t allow those things to manifest in my character, do they carry the same weight? What better way to prompt that manifestation than to extend my thoughts, love, and actions into the outside world by speaking, evangelising, and serving? For the unsure, this isn’t easy. And it doesn’t always turn out to be fun. Sometimes, you say or do the wrong thing, and sometimes people don’t want what you’re offering. You don’t always see results and you don’t always feel good about it, or accomplished. But God rewards the faithful.It’s not always fun, no. But it’s worth it, I promise.

5. Tejuino is the worst beverage man has ever concocted. Ever.

Seriously. Everyone here thinks it’s the ichor of the heavens, but it tastes horrible. I don’t know what exactly I was expecting from a drink composed mainly of fermented corn, ice, and lime juice, but I attempted to try something new and it backfired horrendously. Tejuino? More like tejuiNO.

Tlajomulco was amazing. I may be missing my last year at Love Packages, but as I predicted, God more than made up for it. In fact, He went beyond my expectations (they can never be high enough). I’m in awe – really. I just hope I can make it back there one day, knowing now what I didn’t know then.

That’s it for now! Next will be what I learned in Vanguard this semester – a list of a few of my favourite classes.

And just a heads up: I’ll be home June 27th, and I’m set to leave for Mexico again on July 11th. That’s two weeks of Miko in America. It’s been amazing down here, but of course, I’m excited to visit home for a couple of weeks to see my family and friends.

Ed:
Thank you so much for the ongoing love and support! It is greatly, greatly appreciated. I will definitely be making time to talk with you when I get back, sir! No doubt.
**(P.S – A big THANK YOU to you and your wife for letting your daughter come down here with Lex to bring me back home! I was giddy when I saw her name on the ticket receipts…)

Don’t forget to like, share, and comment, please! It means a lot to hear from you guys!

 

What You’ve Missed Part 5: Devotionals

On By Kamiko BlalarkIn Encouragement, La Fuente, Mexico, Vanguardia2 Comments

Hello beloved!

In What You’ve Missed Part 3, I mentioned very briefly the fact that we do devotionals in class on a regular basis. Most times, the devotionals are done by the pastors and other staff of the school, but sometimes they will pick on a student (or students) to share something with class. A few weeks ago, I was that trusted student. So, I’ve decided to share with you what I shared with my morning class, rewritten from the outline I wrote (the night before I had to present it).2016-03-18

Me (looking photogenic, as usual) and my translator, Saulo (translating, as usual). Many thanks to him!

Like many of you, the calling I received to come here meant leaving home. And though my friends and family and I would discuss “Miko in Mexico” with light-hearted words of fun and excitement, I knew that part of that was to cover up the reality of – “okay, what am I doing?” Because though I hid it all behind a veil of smiles and nods and “yeah, I’m pretty nervous, but I’ll be okay,” I couldn’t change the fact that the deeper I dug and the harder I looked, there was fear. Because unlike the rest of you (except Jonah, obviously), I had to not only leave home, but I had to travel 1,726 miles (2,778 kilometers) to leave behind an entire culture and way of life. The culture and language that I had spent over 18 years being wholly dependent on – to express myself and my thoughts and feelings, to shape my future and make sense of my past, to understand who I am and to convey that to others – all of it would carry a significantly lesser meaning once I crossed the border that separates my land from yours. If any of you took the time to visit my website (thank you, if you did!), you may remember a post I wrote on feeling alone and out of place.

Please, don’t get me wrong – I love Mexico! I love you guys! This miniature “woe is me” rant was all to say: this is what it is to be saved, to be Christian. Well, it’s one part of the incredibly magnificent whole, at least.

My analogy will be drawn from what Pastor Alex taught Tuesday evening, where I was reminded that I am not merely a “fixed,” or a “remastered” creation. I am new. Here’s the picture that was painted for me: when you visit a country in which you intend to spend an extended length of time, what is the most critical thing you must do? Hint – it isn’t to learn their language or to adopt their culture as fast as you can.

The first, most critical thing you must do is to take your 18, 20, or 30+ years of your primary, ingrained culture and way of life… and throw it away. En serio. Throw it away, burn it, scrub it out of your skin and your clothes and don’t look back. Take the phrase “uncultured swine” to new heights and leave yourself with nothing to cling onto but what’s in front of you. Because honestly, there’s no way you can realistically rid yourself completely of the culture you were given as a child and carried into your adult years. I mean, you still need to talk. But the point is, if you set that goal for yourself, you’ll find it easier to learn the foreign language and culture.

When we become Christians, regardless of how young or old we were, the term we use to describe ourselves is “born again.” Why? Because we are new creatures. Why? The quick answer – the Bible says so, and if you’re here, you most likely are under the belief that the Bible is the Word of God, so in other words, God says so. And I can’t recall a situation in which God said something and His Word returned void. So when God says we are new, it doesn’t mean we will be new; it doesn’t mean we might become new, or that novelty is reserved only for a chosen few. We are new – it’s part of who we are. It’s something of a promise.

So the parallel is this – when we become Christians, we are called to live differently. And because He says we are new, we should have no trouble doing just that. We become “uncultured,” in the sense that we have completely abandoned our carnal way of living in exchange for a life guided solely by the Spirit. We become “little Christs,” or “Christians.” In other words, we cannot keep referencing our old way of life. We no longer live in our flesh, but we live in the Spirit – the rules that applied to our former state have no place in our new, and vice versa. Because though His death and resurrection happened over 2,000 years ago, Christ took our old, carnal, and destructive lives and threw them away, burned them, scrubbed them out of our skin and our clothes and told us not to look back. Again, it’s a bit of an exaggeration. We can’t fully let go of our pasts, but we can rid ourselves of the dependence we have on them.

This doesn’t just apply to those of us with “shady” or troubled pasts, either. You don’t have to have been a drug dealer/user, a sex addict, victim of abuse, or a thief to have a powerful claim of liberation from your past. Because the truth is, we have all been liberated from the same things. Not only in the sense that “I had a good childhood, so I was never raised into a life of crime as a result of being from a broken home, so in a way I have been saved from that.” While this way of thinking is true and does what a testimony should do (give glory to God), it isn’t the only way of looking at it. Think about the promises in the Bible. They are things God has spoken over us. He tells us that we are now conquerors, co-heirs, alive, forgiven, and free in Christ Jesus. But why are these things written in the Bible? Why does God even say this?

Because we are not any of these things by nature. On the contrary, because of the Fall, we are the complete opposite. Regardless of who we are or where we come from, we are born defeated. We are born lowly orphans. We are born dead, even. We are born indebted with the weight of our own wrong-doings, and perhaps most tragically, we are born in bondage. But when the work of the cross was finished and Christ defeated death, God spoke, and He calls us free. Worthy, righteous, loved, His. And He calls us new.

Christ paid a hefty price for these titles. And I know these words are all painfully worn out. I know we are all probably struggling with things and we have all heard people tell us – “put it all in God’s hands,” and “remember, our battles have all been won on the cross.” But it’s true. Please, focus on God’s promises, on His words. We are not our struggles. In fact, we aren’t even the struggles we have overcome. By all means, look back at what God has brought you through and use it as a reminder of His goodness and grace and mercy. Glorify Him. But don’t stay there. Move on. Remember that we are nothing more than what He says we are and what He’s called us to be. If you feel overwhelmed by circumstance – you’re an overcomer. It applies in every situation. God doesn’t deal with things as they arise. He’s already dealt with our struggles fully. And we may go through life feeling like we are doing everything wrong at every turn. But it’s important to note that it isn’t our job to do everything right – we’ve already failed at this, honestly. All this self-imposed responsibility is going to do is draw us away from Him. Our job is to live for Christ alone, and in turn He supplies us with the strength we need to live His purpose. Speak out and declare His words over your life and you will live them out.

There you have it. Thank you all for your support and love! Don’t forget to ask me questions! Until next time – Dios los bendiga!

P.S – Please don’t forget to donate! Every little bit helps! Muchas gracias!